Lazy Lump.

Here are some of the unproductive ways that I will spend the precious hours I have today while Rudy is napping and Marley is in kindergarten.  I will not, unfortunately, shimmy around the house and belt out "Me Party" like Amy Adams and Miss Piggy in The Muppets, even though that's what I told Marley I do whenever I'm on my own at home.

Instead, I will:

1.  eat too many chocolate chip (with so many yummy walnuts) cookies;
2.  browse Etsy aimlessly and wistfully, favorite-ing things I will never purchase without finally winning the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes;
3.  watch segments from DVRed Daily Shows and Colbert Reports;
4.  continually check twitter, dlisted, the White House, the Onion, and Celtics-related websites for jolts of frivolity and happiness;
5.  fool around with a few random photos in iPhoto and Instagram and avoid the larger photo organization and printing I should be catching up on in Snapfish;
6.  imagine how I would like to redecorate my bedroom with a budget of something depressing and ridiculous like $15;
7.  feel bad for feeling bad about my bedroom because so many people in the world have it so much worse;
8.  play word games and other brainteaser puzzles on my iPhone and justify it because I'm afraid of dementia, early onset or otherwise;
9.  think about the pile of papers on the bookshelf behind me that indicate the tasks I should be completing;
10.  create a list of the ways in which I will waste my afternoon.